I haven't been writing for a long time because I've been so busy and emotionally overwhelmed. I finished the hardest rotation I've had in a while and I'm glad it's over. I dreaded going to work every time I went to sleep and when I would wake up. I had dreams about work. I had to deal with a lot of unpleasant personalities and felt demoralized on a daily basis. I had two "okay" days during that rotation. I never had a truly "good day.".
A lot of my friends are feeling burn out in medicine too, we're exhausted and feel a little unfulfilled because we work so hard and there's little appreciation for us. Enduring residency is hard and it takes an emotional toll on you for so many reasons.
You will feel stressed and overwhelmined in residency and med school but you're not alone. I'm coming to find many residents feel like I do and that I'm not here only one who is homesick and tired and worn. There are a lot of people who you can connect with and who can help you get through difficult times.
If you're an upper level, help out your lower levels and interns, it means a lot to them. I've also found that learning as much as you can on a daily basis at work and reading at home helps bring a little fulfillment and sense of accomplishment to you when you're so overworked and feel like you're burning out.
I was once told by a resident as a med student to not count down the days until residency is over, or you'll go crazy. It's pretty true. All you can do is try to continue living your life outside of residency and finding and doing fulfilling things when you can because your life gets taken over by work and studying in residency.
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