This year is the first year I've been alone on a service on call. I felt anxious and directionless at first and now I feel mostly lonely and melancholy. There aren't many emergencies here to stress me out but there are a lot of new situations I find myself in. Fortunately I have some time to learn on my own and make decisions.
In residency which is a time where you learn to be a proper doctor, there are many times you don't receive teaching, instruction, or advice. The culture of medicine can be extremely impersonal and isolating, and I find myself continuously enduring waiting for it all to end.
If you find yourself feeling alone, some of the things are to bring food from home or a place you like to order from, and carry things in your backpack like a small speaker or a tablet or some drinks you like.
Remaining hopeful is the most important thing, as hard as it is. I know I'm frequently sad and stressed and this year will be no exception. Hopefully I'm stronger than last year though.
There is so much pressure and stress in medicine that I'm not sure if I'd choose it again. I miss my loved ones everyday and I know they have been damaged by my medical training.
If you're a lonely intern in July by yourself, remember there's someone out there thinking about you and cheering you along.
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