originally wrote a long entry but deleted it just now.  kind of pulling myself back together.  its weird not being a trainee anymore.  it's a lot of adjustment.  more tired than I was before, but some aspects are better.

i wanted to thank everyone who left comments of support on this blog.  i have nothing positive to say about those who had nothing constructive or supportive to say.  maybe those people will find happiness and stop being like that. 

thought about shutting down here, but maybe there are others who will be struggling and they need to know someone like me can get through it.